rashanaworks - blog

Wednesday's Progress

2012-01-25T21:43:00.000-05:00

Only one thing to do on the projector tonight - affix the mouse circuit board to the bottom of the projector and then wait for it to set. Tomorrow while it's still upside down, I'll visit Andy again to work on the other projector. With any luck I'll have both the projectors finished really soon!

The re-design of my website should also be finished soon. I just need to load photos and write up an artistic statement. There are some things I'd like to work on still, but I need to give it a rest and go on to other things like, say... choreography.

Tuesday Evening - Further Progress

2012-01-24T22:33:00.002-05:00

Sunday night David and I took some measurements and then headed to Lowes to by some hardware. I decided to add feet that would allow enough room for the mouse board underneath the projector. I opted not to build a wooden base because 1) I don't have time to make the kind of wooden base I would like, 2) I don't want to spend a ton of money, 3) I want to have relatively easy access to the mouse board should I need it later, and 4) I kind of like the idea of possibly seeing someone trying to peek to see where the flexible wire cable leads.

In my package of hardware, I had two little rubber o-rings. Yay! Now, the reels won't fly off! (Thanks for this cool reel, Jean Pitman!)

David has a much steadier hand than I, so he had the honor of drilling through the metal and also the rubber feet. He countersunk the rubber feet so the screws wouldn't stick out the ends. When I install this projector at Urban Arts Space, I'll get longer screws that will also go through the top of the cabinet on which the projector will sit. The projector is simply not heavy enough not to be mounted.

The last task tonight for this project (because I also need to work on the website re-design) was using epoxy to affix the flexible wire cable to the crank shaft. I'll leave it alone to set. It's so tempting to test it out and to get this all done tonight, but I'll wait...

Hand-crank Projector Progress - Lindstrom

2012-01-22T13:05:00.003-05:00

I'm getting further along with the reconstruction/re-imagining of the hand-crank projectors. Thanks to Andy Hensler at the Wexner Center, I'm learning a lot about these projectors and the mechanics of how to turn an antique hand-crank film projector into a digital video projector. Although my approach isn't as "orthodox" as Andy would prefer, I think we're finding some good solutions. For example, I had to resort to buying the projectors on ebay. I can only see so much in the pictures that the sellers provide. I made it part of the project to do the best I could with what I could get. I don't have all the time and money in the world to start amassing a lot of projectors. In any case, we're figuring things out. Our biggest concern, no matter what projector we use, is how long the cranking mechanism will hold up against all the churning that might happen.

Here's the crank-side view of the Lindstrom, my favorite projector. The metal is thin and a lot of things were screwed into place instead of pressed or soldered. This was helpful for my simple mind. I could take things apart quickly and easily to get an idea of how things worked. First thing we took off was the back compartment that housed the light bulb. Next we took the clamp off that held the film in place which would be in the way of the lens of the video projector. Andy took the lens off and then we decided how the back compartment needed to be cut to eventually house the video projector - which turned out to be a slot in the back to give room for the electrical cords and a slotted notch in the front for the lens of the video projector. Also, there's sturdy foam cut into a useful base that holds the digital projector firmly in place inside the compartment.

The placement of the video projector proved much easier than I thought; it was made easier since the original antique lens was easy to remove. We wanted to keep the idea of the original look of the lens cylinder above the crank handle. Andy found a random object in his workshop that could serve as a substitute without obscuring the projection from the digital projector.

Andy had a really good sense of how to connect the cranking mechanism to the potentiometer of the scrolling mouse. He drilled a hole through the middle of the pulley shaft that connects to the handle on the other side. He then threaded a flexible wire into the hole and then crimped the other end of the wire into the mouse wheel.

This is a simple solution that seems to work well. We're still concerned with how long this connection will hold up. I am superglueing the end of the wire that connects to the pulley shaft just to be on the safe side. I'm fairly certain that the crimping will hold on the mouse side, but we'll find out soon enough. We had the option to use an allen wrench to connect the wire to the potentiometer, but Andy decided to use the plastic mouse wheel instead which I think is a better idea anyway. I was a little concerned that the metal allen wrench might strip the plastic potentiometer over time. I like using the connection that was originally built into the construction of the mouse.

The next issue was deciding where to mount the mouse board. We discussed mounting it below the pulley shaft which at first glance, as Andy held it in a reasonable place, disturbed my sense of aesthetics. The green circuit board might highlight the modernization of the projector, but it was all I could see. Upon hearing my response, Andy just smiled at me and said that it was no problem to mount it upside down and spray paint it black. "Oh, okay."

Ultimately, we opted to mount the board (which I still have to do) underneath the projector because the bend of the wire will be less convoluted or severe. Andy hot glued parts of the original mouse housing back to the circuit board to make it easier for me to glue the board to the bottom of the projector.

When I got the parts home yesterday, I plugged the USB connection from the mouse board into my laptop and voila, it worked like a charm.

List of things I still need to do to finish this projector:

- secure the wire to the projector with super glue

- build a small base for the projector (since the mouse mechanism will be on the bottom)

- secure the mouse circuitry to the bottom of the projector

- screw the back compartment securely into place

- find a small washer or rubber stop to keep the bottom reel from flying off

Here's a detail of the crank-side that had the lens and film clamp before we removed it. Just in case you wondered...

Week One of Winter 2012 Quarter Done!

2012-01-07T21:21:00.002-05:00

So far, I'm loving this quarter. I'm taking two Contemporary Dance Technique classes (one by Abby Zbikowski and one by Meghan Durham Wall - two excellent teachers) and teaching two classes - Beginning Contemporary and Jazz 2. I love teaching and I love taking classes again.

For the first couple of weeks of Jazz, I am reviewing Jazz from the 20's and 30's. This Monday, we'll watch one of my favorite videos from that era:

Gearing up

2011-12-28T22:19:00.001-05:00

I actually took a day off at Christmas, and even the following day due to a food hangover. By yesterday, I was back to work. I prepped for my Jazz 2 class by posting my syllabus, topical outline and supporting material. All twenty-one students are in my roll book and aside from running through the combination for the first day, I'm ready to go! Still working on my Modern 1 class, but I hope to have that wrapped up by Friday at the latest. It makes me feel so much better when the ground work is done.

I also started laying down some designs in Dreamweaver for the re-design of rashanaworks.com. Surprisingly, I'm happy to be back at it. Designing merrygogo.com was enjoyable too, and I learned A LOT, but it takes so much time that I was kind of putting off my own website till I could get past the idea of how much brain space it takes. I'm also happy to be working with Erik Abbott-Main. We started talking a re-design two years ago and now I'm able to start working with his illustrations. Our focus with the new rashanaworks is to strike a balance between nature and technology, rural-ness and urban-ness, and revealing process as important as product. To the left is one of Erik's designs.

Class and Rehearsal for Hand-cranked Projector

2011-12-24T19:50:00.002-05:00

This is the first draft of the montage from a class and rehearsal with Real Women Dancing (RWD), a group of women in east Texas featuring Juanita Finkenberg, Linda Choate, Vicki Baggett, Kerry Lemon and Sarah McMullan. When I watched the hours of footage I have of RWD, I became even more aware of time. RWD's concentration during ballet barre exercises requires patience, patience that women of their age gracefully embody. I am reminded of an interview with Maya Deren regarding the temporality of women. Here is a link to a youtube video that includes the interview as well as still shots of Deren's work. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MhEOOpbJKEc

This silent video short (which by the way, will also be projected through a hand-cranked projector), will later have an accompanying commentary on my website. The commentary will be taken from my interview of Juanita Finkenberg, founder of Real Women Dancing. Right now though, I'm going to publish this post, put up some laundry and then walk the dog around the block before getting ready for bed. It's Christmas Eve and soon to be a day that I promised David that I'll refrain from working.

Suite 155 for Hand-cranked Projector

2011-12-20T23:42:00.001-05:00

This is the first draft of Suite 155 featuring Benita Bedell and Marianne Gryder from the Bellingham group. Like Monkeys, Suite 155 will project through one of the hand-cranked projectors. This is the only footage I have where the subjects are so concerned with the camera. Benita reminds me a bit of myself as a teenager when I would be in public with my grandfather. I would be slightly embarrassed, but entertained at the same time. This documentary-style short is somewhat reminiscent of the Lumiére Brothers's Baby's Lunch. The movement is obviously different from Monkeys (see previous post) - no dancing, but plenty of gestural material. I love Benita's direct look to the camera at 18 seconds into the short as if to imply, "Are you getting this?" I'll post the video with sound for the behind-the-scenes commentary that will go on the website.

Lumiére Brothers - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEllo1o1J8g

(I find these early documentary-style black and whites interesting, but I hate the soundtracks. I mute them or find something of my own to play.)

Monkeys for Hand-cranked Projector

2011-12-20T14:08:00.001-05:00

This is the first draft of Monkeys featuring Meredith Hurst and Joanna Reed from the Costa Rica group. Monkeys will project through one of the hand-cranked projectors. I chose this particular duet because of its movement qualities and the clarity of the movement with the thought that it would be ideal for audience interaction. I'm still questioning whether I really want it to be black and white with soft edges because it seems too obvious to pair up with an antique projector. Still, I really love black and white because it's a bit dreamy and maybe even a little more accessible because of it. Below are links to influences for the treatment of Monkeys:

Lumiere Brothers - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4nj0vEO4Q6s

Here's an interesting study on black and white film for modern movies:
http://flavorwire.com/181969/10-modern-movies-that-are-better-in-black-and-white

And for some reason, I could help but think of rare footage of modern dance:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ESN6INXE0_E&feature=related

Posting Student Work and Grooming Pai

2011-12-19T21:49:00.002-05:00

The past couple of days have been spent logging and posting student work for their own personal review from Vickie Blaine's composition class. I'm always amazed at how long that takes me. It's a frustratingly tedious task - one that keeps me from working on my own videos. But it's done now - at last!

The other pretty time consuming chore involves a big hairy dog. One third done - two thirds to go. You'd think she'd be bald from the looks of this picture - but no - still as furry as ever.

More Helmet Cam Footage

2011-12-16T23:26:00.001-05:00

And here's scrimmage footage from the helmet cam:

I can't wait to turn some of this footage into the video that will run through one of the hand-cranked projectors!

Cannibalizing a Scrolling Mouse

2011-12-14T18:14:00.001-05:00

So, I'm taking this scrolling mouse (see that red round button - it's important)

and its USB connection and connect it to a laptop running MaxMSPJitter. A digital Pico projector will also be connected to the laptop.

I took the board out of the mouse and now will need to decide how to connect it to or conceal it in one of the antique hand-crank projectors.

The red scroll button normally connects to the potentiometer on the board. My next task is to create a connection between the crank mechanism of the hand-crank projectors to the potentiometer. The potentiometer signal will deliver the speed and direction of the cranking to a Jitter patch. The Jitter patch will spit out the rate and direction of the video according to the cranking. The video will play through the digital projector that will eventually be placed somewhere inside the hand-crank projector. This is some fun stuff!!!!

Snippet of Helmet Cam Footage

2011-12-14T01:55:00.001-05:00

A little example of the footage from the helmet cam. It's not edited yet; it's just raw footage:

Antique Projectors - Digital Projectors

2011-12-12T18:11:00.007-05:00

I'm turning these antique projectors into interactive digital projectors. First thing to do - find some mice and take them apart to see what I can do with them. More to come!

Alterations

2011-08-18T00:01:00.007-04:00

"Each telling of a history, speech, situation, proclamation, translation, or revelation had to be altered, at least a little, to fit its times or the customs of its hearer. And so convincingly did he have to sell his words, throwing himself into them with the passion of a true believer, that it became increasingly worrisome for him to remember for whom he had invented which chronicle, revealed what secrets, claimed which kinship, or inserted which omissions..."

This is a quote from "The Book of Portraiture," specifically the first chapter. The authentic, transparent depiction of the women I interview for my project is of the utmost concern of mine. I cannot deny that I have biases. All I can do is be honest with them. This is resting heavily on my mind these days.

Oh, and why did I post these particular pictures? Appearances and functionality of objects can change and so can the stories we tell to describe them. My guess is that the way I retell the stories about my curly hair or my blistered feet could also change over time. Memory also changes. The point is to make the effort to use the best pictures to tell the stories so at least they stay close to original intention of the stories they represent.

Portraiture - Photography

2011-08-17T08:22:00.009-04:00

Aside from reading critical essays, reviews, and theory, I found an interesting book conveniently aligned with my project, "The Book of Portraiture" by Steve Tomasula. Each chapter has a different narrator. Each narrator searches for a way to represent themselves, either through stories, paintings, photography, or genetic code. I'm charting a similar exercise for myself. Today are self-portraits I snapped over the course of sixteen years.

Summer 2011

2011-08-16T10:51:00.009-04:00

Besides working at the Wexner Center this summer, I've concentrated most of my effort at understanding how I fit into the Ohio Roller Girls. What better way to understand the difficulty of the questions I ask the interviewees of other women's organization then to turn the questions on myself. Asking myself what role I fill or how I want my fellow skaters to perceive me is harder to answer than, say asking myself what role I fill as a dancer in OSU's Department of Dance. I already have a feeling for what kind of dancer I am. After all, I've been dancing for more than twenty years now. In roller derby, however, I'm still trying to figure out the sport. The newness of my involvement leads me naturally to more questions, and after one year of skating, falling down, booty-blocking, getting hit by other skaters, etc. - I'm continually finding more questions to ask. My involvement in this sport spurs my inquisitive nature and that's just what I need as I travel to Washington state and Texas to interview other organizations as part of my Master's thesis project. Now that my commitment to the Wexner Center is completed, I have renewed energy and more time to devote to processing all this wonderful information swirling around in my head. I'm back to blogging and will be back tomorrow!

With Translations...

2011-05-22T16:52:00.001-04:00

Here's a second rough draft that I showed for the Artist Interrupted conference May 20, 2011.

Costa Rica - Profiles

2011-04-28T13:53:00.004-04:00

Day Eight

2011-04-28T13:52:00.003-04:00

Day Seven

2011-04-28T13:51:00.003-04:00

Day Six

2011-04-28T13:15:00.003-04:00

Day Five and Nine Technique Classes

2011-04-28T13:09:00.003-04:00

Videos - Day Four

2011-04-28T13:07:00.004-04:00

Video for Day Three in Costa Rica

2011-04-26T20:36:00.005-04:00

Day Three in Costa Rica at the National Park in Manuel Antonio:

To learn more about this day, please refer to these prior posts:

http://rashanaworks.blogspot.com/2011/03/day-three-national-park-manuel-antonio.html

and

http://rashanaworks.blogspot.com/2011/03/day-two-coopesilencio.html

Finally Getting Videos Together

2011-03-29T07:44:00.002-04:00

Here's Day Two's Collage:

Going Home!

2011-03-26T09:13:00.004-04:00

Above is a picture of a native Costa Rican plant. Sonia loves this plant and has them in several places around her house. I'm going to miss Sonia. I wish I understood spanish better, however, we managed just fine. When I return to Costa Rica with David, I WILL know more spanish! And I'll have friends to visit!

I'm looking forward to picking back up on Day Four of our trip, but now Sonia is calling for me, "Baby!" She just made the most phenomenal cake. Picture coming soon!

Quick Note Before Last Class

2011-03-25T10:42:00.003-04:00

Time is very precious on this trip. I just spent most of my morning talking with Sonia and watching her body language in order to understand her stories (and what interesting stories they were!). Now I have 15 minutes to get ready for my last class at El Barco. I will have to wait until I return to the States to continue with my day by day documentation on this blog. It's absolutely important to me to complete the series as my way of processing this trip.

By the way, the picture is from the festival in Siquirres.

Talk to you/see you soon!

Necesito un café con leche

2011-03-24T09:35:00.003-04:00

We got home late last night from a festival in Siquirres. It was close to eleven o'clock, and while that's not really late for me normally, I definitely felt it this morning. Typically since I've been here I have woken up on my own at 5:30am. Not so today. Sonia had to wake me up from a dead sleep by knocking on my door. I'm surprised that it's taken me this long to feel tired. Surprised and relieved actually.

Today we dance with the students at El Barco and then show. I'm looking forward to this!

I'll continue with my day by day account tonight or tomorrow morning.

Adios por ahora!

Day Three - National Park Manuel Antonio

2011-03-23T13:02:00.006-04:00

By the time we got to the park, we only had an hour before the park closed at 4pm. That didn’t give us much time to explore the wildlife or plant life as much as we wanted. That said beautiful movement studies of monkeys, lizards, birds, and deer presented themselves on the beach that day. I have some great video footage, but for the sake of quickly uploading images, I will pull some stills from the video, so keep reading...

Alexis and I held back from the group and executed our own “Noticed What We Notice” walk, an exercise Simone Forti writes about in “Animate Dancing.” I noticed that I watched the other students for clues about wildlife. If they bent over to see lizards or looked up to see monkeys swinging in the trees, I followed their leads. They became indicators for me. When we made it to the first beach on the trail, they immediately indicated that they were going to swim. I don’t think they could shed their clothing down to their swimsuits fast enough. I couldn’t blame them – it was a beautiful day and a beautiful beach and they needed to blow a little steam in some relaxing water. To my surprise, they were ready to dance when Alexis and I queued them to get out of the water and go over what they wanted to share with the group for our “Human/Animal Motions” activity. For the most part we were all able to deduce which animals were represented. This activity was just a taste of what we could work on more throughout the week here and something we could develop more after we return to the US.

Some quick thoughts about what I saw:

The looseness of shoulders in Meredith and Joanna’s monkey dance...

The lines of lizards that Kiki and Brittany saw...

The nonchalance of a wandering deer performed by Mary and Haley...

The cautious inquisitiveness of Rachel and Emily’s black bird...

Day Three - Coopesilencio

2011-03-23T12:02:00.006-04:00

Saturday we traveled to Coopesilencio in Quepos. This particular community works the land together – their main crop (rather large covering hundreds of hectáreas/acres) is the African palm plant. They sell the fruit from the plants for oil that is used in cosmetic crèmes. They also conduct ecological tours – hikes, rafting, etc. for visitors. The community does all the work; each person has a job and all the money goes back to their own community and their families. All decisions are made democratically. Our tour guide kept using the phrase, “We use our democracy.” I found this an interesting way of putting it. Though, I’m sure it’s an issue of translation, the phrase reminds me that sometimes in a democracy like the United States, we don’t always “use our democracy" effectively. I mentioned this and he reminded me that they are successful because they are a much smaller community, to which I uttered, “Think locally.” I couldn’t help but think about politics and admittedly, I wish I could have shut that part of my brain off and just appreciate the land and environment. Because we are humans though, I feel like we are all trying to understand (and some are trying to control) the environment with which we live. Going back to Tuan’s “Topophilia” I am again reminded that each person has a different perception of the world around them and with each interpretation, there’s bound to be differing power dynamics.

Regrettably I did not take pictures at Coopesilencio. A few other students were responsible for that documentation and I really wanted the opportunity to be free from holding a camera. I’m glad I gave myself permission because a lot of things swam through my head during that visit. For starters, I want to volunteer there for a week. I left wanting to really experience the actual work, the physicality required to simply live there. The following “timed writing” reflects my time in Coopesilencio:

Heat, beads of sweat running down my white freckled face. Fresh air – enjoy the breeze occasionally sweeping through the covered patio as we eat lunch. Fruit drink, cas, is now my favorite. Our tour guide is the first tico to prounounce the ‘sh’ in my name. He did not say ‘rashana,’ but he did say ‘shana.’ I was elated. Our guide walked us through trails and pointed out the ants carrying leaves back, spiders weaving webs – spiders are our friends, citronella plants, butterflies that camouflage themselves – this one looked like the bark of a tree. The trails are in great condition. Coopesilencio cares about their fellow creatures. The animals they have in pens are there to protect them; they were all domesticated animals whose owners could no longer take care of them - these animals can no longer exist in the wild. This is not to say that there aren’t monkeys in the wild at Coopesilencio. We saw much wildlife. The white-faced monkeys, monkeys, monkeys, monkeys – how they communicate! Barking, smiling, swinging, hugging.

My favorite thing about the tour was something our guide said that I’m not sure everyone heard, but was almost straight out of our readings of Tuan’s “Topophilia” and also Simone Forti’s “Animate Dancing.” He said, “Our eyes are not just for looking; they are for seeing. Our ears are not just for hearing; they are for listening.”

I will write more about how the Forti’s reading played out during the day, but I also want to include this excerpt from David Abram’s “Spell of the Sensuous.”

In the very earliest time
when both people and animals lived on earth,
a person could become an animal if he wanted to
and an animal could become a human being.
Sometimes they were people
and sometimes animals
and there was no difference.
All spoke the same language.
That was the time when words were like magic.
The human mind had mysterious powers.
A word spoken by chance
might have strange consequences.
It would suddenly come alive
and what people wanted to happen could happen-
all you had to do was say it.
Nobody could explain this:
That’s the way it was.

Here Abram was quoting ethnologist Knud Rasmussen to augment his discussion of Merleau-Ponty’s investigation of the “living experience of language – the way the expressive medium discloses itself to us when we do not pretend to stand outside it, but rather accept our inhererence within it, as speaking animals.” Watching those monkeys, not quite twelve of them as in our own party, I saw them as a community quite like the twelve of us students from OSU – each monkey having a personality and a role. While I could not pretend to know the full senses of monkeys as Tuan points out in his work, I felt like I got a general idea of their community. While I want to say that our group is not a group of monkeys hanging out, I’m not sure that it’s a bad thing altogether to admit.

What? The Internet Doesn't Exist Everywhere?

2011-03-23T00:10:00.004-04:00

I've been lucky for the most part. I've found some time to hop on a wireless connection while here, but it's definitely intermittent - which explains why I haven't been able to post each day. And tonight, while the Internet is available, I'm going read instead and then get some sleep. It's been a long day of traveling to Vulcan Poas, creating inconspicuous dances, traveling back to San Jose for class where we created trios with the students of El Barco (muy bien!), interviewing two students, and then figuring out how to catch the correct bus back to Curridabat. Sonia had dinner ready for me when I returned. We spoke more Spanish and I shuffled to my bedroom to check in with David via chat.

Having and changing plans are all a part of traveling. This week has presented some wonderful lessons in problem solving. I secretly love it! Not to say that I love problems, but I love it when things work out. Everyone on the trip has been successful in getting to and from homes and classes without a problem. And we've been pretty good about communicating our needs. We're all looking out for each other - all the while getting to know each other's communication styles. (muy importante!)

I'm signing off for now to get some reading done and to see if I can convince a video to upload. Not sure if that will take all night or not, but I'll give it another try. (muy persistente!)

What Would Have Been Friday's Post - Day Two Part Two

2011-03-20T23:22:00.003-04:00

Sonia walked me to ICADS, the organization who assigned our homestay families. Sonia sweetly blessed me before leaving me for the weekend. I missed her already.

It was great to see the rest of the group all back together safe and sound. Everyone shared how their first night with their host families went. I enjoyed seeing all the wide eyes and smiles. It was a great way to start a very full day.First up - Spanish Survival classes. As I said before, I don't know Spanish. With only two years of high school French, I found myself responding to questions a la francais. This hurt my brain. Cafe con leche to the rescue!
The four hour class was excelente. Our teacher didn't speak english, which was perfecto. I wish I had time for more. I might have to return to Costa Rica for another spanish immersion program!

Next up - an awesome, rejuvenating latin dance class with Roy Ramirez. I forgot just how much I love partner dances. Well I didn’t completely forget, but dancing with Roy made me swoon.

One, he is mucho guapo. Two, it reminded me of my very first teaching gig at Fred Astaire Dance Studios. The Latin dances were my favorite. I loved teaching Swing, Rumba, Cha Cha Cha and Tango. I wanted to dance all day. Lead, follow - whatever. It brought back warm happy memories of teaching social dances. I must admit I miss it.

We broke for lunch. Jimmy and Jose stopped by to say hi quickly and check on us. We were all so happy to see him; it seemed like forever since Ohio.

After lunch we got on a bus for a four hour ride to Manuel Antonio to begin the ecological side of our visit. Videos coming up next as long as the internet holds up!

What Would Have Been Friday's Post - Day Two Part One

2011-03-20T22:52:00.010-04:00

(I've been keeping up via Word until I was able to reach the Internet again. So... here it goes.)

Last night was the third time I've read Yi-Fu Tuan's "Topophila," specifically the second chapter. I love the way it starts out because it reminds me why I am engaged in researching communities.

“The earth's surface is highly varied. Even a casual acquaintance with its physical geography and teeming life forms tells us as much. But the ways in which people perceive and evaluate that surface are far more varied. No two persons see the same reality. No two social groups make precisely the same evaluation of the environment.”

As I walked through Sonia’s house, she pointed out objects in her home and described their significance in Spanish, almost none of which I understood verbally, but mostly understood kinesthetically by her facial expressions. What I noticed:

Her sister recently passed away and it was obvious that she missed her dearly.
She loved the chocolate I brought her and that made us both very happy.
Three birds – parakeets, maybe?
Yellow roses and other beautiful plants that she made a point of mentioning represented her love for gardening.
I now know that “Poco, poco” means “little bit, by little bit.” Sonia is very patient with my lack of Spanish.
It seemed like my room might have been an addition to the main structure of the house or is that just my North American imagination?
She made the most of her kitchen. It wasn’t large by U.S. standards, but it seemed like she had everything possible to make the most wonderful meals.
She reminded me of my relatives, which made me feel really comfortable.

I’m curious about differences besides geography, age and language. I'm also curious if I'm really understanding her correctly. Hopefully I will have interview questions in español when I return from the weekend at Manuel Antonio. Here's where we're staying: http://www.verdemar.com/.

We made it to Costa Rica!

2011-03-18T06:26:00.005-04:00

We made it to Costa Rica! It felt like a small miracle by the time we each were dropped off to our host families. Everything went fine; don't get me wrong. It was definitely a long day though preceded by most of us not sleeping the night before. Some of us are still a little sick from the stress of winter quarter. I suspect everyone's going to feel much better today; we're going to the pacific coast.

I went to bed early last night. I was beat and the food that my gracious host Sonia prepared (along with a cake decorated with my name!) was mucho delicioso and practically put me into a food coma. I heard she was a good cook and she definitely did not disappoint. (Let's see if I can get all this correct - yeah for google translate.) She served: crepes de pollo una salsa blanca y ensalada y platano asado. I was so excited when she asked me if I wanted cafe con leche because besides de bano and uno, dos, tres..... - that's about all the spanish I know. Ferdinand, our bus driver knows Sonia very well. He joined us for dinner. He doesn't really speak English either. From what I could understand, they wanted me to hear as much Spanish as possible. By the time Sonia explained how to operate the shower, I thought I could understand her words, even though I knew I didn't. She mimed to me that I turn the water on this way, let it wash over me quickly, turn the water off, soap up, turn the water on and rinse off - water is too precious to stand under it the whole time.

Before turning my light off, I went over our itineraries again to consolidate them. I have my own research itinerary, the itinerary from Norah Zuniga Shaw (our professor who made this trip possible) and the itinerary we received yesterday from ICADS (the Costa Rican study abroad organization). Some of the events have changed a little, which is bound to happen. There was a little uneasiness at first about the changes, but I am confident that everyone will adapt gracefully and I'm so anxious to hear about their first night with their homestay families. We're going to have a lot to share this morning!

Currently, it's a little after 5am. I've been up since before 4. (I really went to bed early!) Sonia said she'll knock on my door at 6am and breakfast will be at 7. More cafe con leche! Until then I will work on recording my thoughts about our first activity and the reading I did before going to bed. That will follow soon!

¡hasta luego

Correction!

2011-03-16T15:48:00.003-04:00

It's been pointed out to me that in my earlier post about Costa Rica I said I was leaving for 10 weeks and I thought - "nah, no I didn't." Lo and behold I did! I must really need a break. I'm only leaving for 10 days. :-) See ya before the end of March!

First Game of the Season

2011-03-14T20:36:00.003-04:00

Old news, but I just noticed the post and thought I would share.

Ohio Roller Girls

If you're in Columbus, the next bout is April 2. I probably won't play since I will have just gotten back from Costa Rica - but check us out anyway! It's a lot of fun! Plus, there's always great afterparties. ;-)

Okay, back to work I go....

Temporary Stress

2011-03-14T18:20:00.006-04:00

It's been months since I last posted. Second year Winter Quarter is rough stuff. A lot of grant writing on top of everything else in graduate school. I'm taking a quick break while I transfer VHS footage to DVD in order to say hi there! Although I haven't posted much in a while, a lot has happened - more than I want to type in fact. The short news though is I leave Thursday the 17th for a ten week cultural exchange program in Costa Rica. I'm really excited although it really hasn't sunk in yet that I'm leaving the country. I have media projects and a ten page research paper to get finished and then I can get ready for some sun and dancing in Costa Rica. I can't wait!

Upcoming Performance

2011-01-11T21:00:00.002-05:00

Theatre of the Obsessed

Fellow graduate students, Betsy Miller and Maungsai Somboon, will present their Master of Fine Arts thesis projects. I am performing in Somboon's project. You have three nights to choose from!

Thursday - Saturday

February 3-5, 2011

8:00pm

The Ohio State University

Sullivant Hall Theater

1813 N. High Street at 15th Avenue

Tickets:

$10/general, $5/students, seniors

Winter Quarter 2011 - so far so good!

2011-01-09T22:28:00.006-05:00

So far the Winter Quarter is pretty cool - aside from the awful cold I have right now. Above is an example of the kind of cinema I'm watching right now in my Silent Cinema class - which I LOVE.

Here's my schedule:

Mondays

8-10 - Wexner Center

10:30 - 12:00 - Modern Technique class

12:15 - 6:15 - Wexner Center

Tues/Thurs

8:45 - 10:15 - Professional Development Seminar

10:30 - 1:00 - Wexner Center

1:30 - 3:20 - Silent Cinema class

3:30 - 5:00 - Wexner Center

Evening Derby Practice

Wednesdays

8-10 - Wexner Center

10:30 - 12:00 - Modern Technique class

12:30 - 2:30 - Wexner Center

2:45 - 4:15 - Workshop in Dance for Costa Rica

6:00 - 8:00 - Rehearsal with Erik Abbott-Main

Fridays

10:30 - 12:00 - Modern Technique class or catch up at Wexner Center

1:00 - 2:30 - Rehearsal with Maungsai Somboon

Saturdays

1:00 - 3:00 - Rehearsal with Maungsai Somboon

Derby Practice

So far, I'm having a good time...

Gearing up...

2010-12-30T09:32:00.006-05:00

"Where focus goes, energy flows. And if you don't take the time to focus on what matters, then you're living a life of someone else's design." - Tony Robbins via The Daily Love

I'm taking some time the next couple of days for some concerted planning and designing. There's only a year and a half left of graduate school for me. I want to make the most of it!

Fall Quarter Synopsis

2010-12-20T21:09:00.021-05:00

I realize that I say this every quarter, but I'll pretend I don't and say it anyway - "This quarter was incredibly intense!" I think it's fair to say that I took on way more than I ever imagined I could (or probably should have) and I lived another day to talk about it. Two major factors contributed to said intensity.

1) I started my journey in WFTDA skills testing so that I could skate in bouts with the Ohio Roller Girls. WFTDA stands for Women's Flat Track Derby Association for those who are new to derby. I'm a baby in this sport. It's frightening, humbling and exciting all at the same time. And it's engrossing.

2) As for my course work, this quarter was completely tech heavy. I went to Gaga technique once or twice a week as an independent study, but other than that my physical practice really involved skating, hitting, and falling during derby practice. If it weren't for derby, I really wouldn't have had much time away from the computer. BUT a lot of great things came out of this quarter. Here goes:

Since the video file is too large, these are some snapshots from an animation I created in Maya. This was my first class in modeling, animating and lighting objects using software - yet another new world I visited this quarter. More humiliation perhaps, but a lot of little discoveries. I'm not sure what the future holds for me and Maya, but I do know that I would like to take the concept from this project and apply it to a redesign of my website.

And then there's "Women of the Flat Track." For my Dance for Camera/Video Editing class, I decided to focus on derby. Hey - it's movement! Kind of hard to deny that. What I discovered was that I wanted to make a feature-length documentary about the Ohio Roller Girls. My final project became a trailer (since obviously I wasn't going to make a documentary in less than 10 weeks). I'm super psyched to make the documentary now. Some of the footage will actually tie into my MFA project as well, which is tentative called "Portraiture and Perception." (That's another thing, I handed in my first draft of my final project to my committee. Things are moving along with this grad degree business!) You can find the trailer at my vimeo account, however, you'll need a password to see the video. Let me know if you have any questions....

As a continued independent study project, I am collaborating with Maree ReMalia and Michael Morris to develop merrygogo, Maree's website that examines her choreographic process. The attached image is a screenshot of "my" process. The mind map was started by Michael and at this point, I was just testing how the embedding of the map was going to work. I have more formating and transparency issues, but development is coming along.

It's already the week of Christmas. Now that I've wrapped up the 2010 Fall Quarter, I think I can move on (well except for the fact that all of these projects are continuing in one way or another). For now though - Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

Skatemare Before Christmas 2010

2010-11-22T09:44:00.004-05:00

Skatemare Before Christmas is Today!

2010-11-20T09:04:00.006-05:00

My first public scrimmage is today! It's interleague, meaning that we split our league into two teams and play each other. It's the Roller Ghouls vs the Jingle Bells. We have to create skate names for this particular bout. Mine is LaRue Morgue (based on the short story by Edgar Allan Poe). Here are some preliminary costume pics. More pictures and video to follow.

In Rehearsal with Woody

2010-11-10T09:39:00.002-05:00

In rehearsal with Woody circa 1993. Sometimes it just helps me to look at this picture.

Yeah For an Extra Hour

2010-11-07T20:28:00.005-05:00

What a great weekend! I spent most of it at home working on Maree ReMalia's website for her MFA project. While I'm excited by the possibilities of future animations for the site, I'm really happy with the current state of the design right now - simple. A nice clean design makes me smile. I'll post the web address when it's ready. The logo was designed by Michael Morris.

Reality of Being a Grad Student

2010-11-02T19:54:00.006-04:00

There are so many wonderful opportunities at this big university and in Columbus. I have fallen in love with roller derby. The fact of the matter though is that grad school requires a lot of time - that really goes without saying. Tonight, instead of going to derby practice I'm working on a video project for my editing class (albeit the video is about roller derby) and hopefully getting some sleep tonight. I'm exhausted!

I also have an animation project coming up. Below is a short animation that I'm building on:

Next Performance coming up!

2010-10-30T18:17:00.003-04:00

this physical body is the meeting place of worlds
a presentation of writing and choreography

Fellow graduate student, Lisa Ferrugia Atkinson, will present her Master of Fine Arts thesis project. I am honored to be a part of her project. Enjoy some art on a Monday evening!

Monday, November 8, 2010, 5:00pm
The Ohio State University, Sullivant Hall, Studio 1
1813 N. High Street at 15th Avenue and High Street
Free Admission!

Phew! Back After a Blogging Break

2010-10-24T09:49:00.007-04:00

I can't believe a month has already passed since my last entry. I've been busy trying to get a handle on this quarter. It's definitely different from last year. While Gaga technique serves to save my sanity and my joints and muscles, I'm predominately preoccupied with technology and roller derby. After derby practice at night, a morning Gaga class works out muscle soreness nicely! I am thankful for this. I am also thankful that I have Friday off to rest, spend time with David or have meetings with my new advising committee, Valarie Williams and Melanye White Dixon. Friday makes all the difference, especially since the weekend seems to be full of going to performances, volunteering for derby events and completing chores. There's still barely time for homework. That said, today I am combining a derby practice with storyboarding homework. I'm not skating today, but am going to practice anyway to do my storyboarding. We'll see if it helps with inspiration or if it's just plain distracting.

My final MFA project will consist of several video shorts that have a documentary feel. I am taking a project I did last fall and developing some of the ideas and concepts. Here's a link to the 100th post.

Autumn 2010 Class Begin

2010-09-22T18:48:00.009-04:00

First day of classes started today. I've held off reporting what I will be up to this quarter till I knew exactly what that is and now, finally (I think) I know.

Mondays, Wednesdays

10:30 - 12:00 - Gaga Technique by visiting artists from the Batsheva Dance Company. (An hour and a half non-stop moving - really - you can't stop and you can't talk. Perfect!)
12:30 - 6:30 - working at The Wexner Center

Tuesdays, Thursdays

10:00 - 12:00 - 3d Computer Animation (crazy excited for this!)
12:30 - 4:30 - working at The Wexner Center
4:30 - 6:30 - Video Editing and Video Dance (again - very excited)
9:00 - 11:00 - Roller Derby practice (that's right 9-11 at night) Check out Ohio Rollergirls for more information about the league - http://www.ohiorollergirls.com.

Saturdays

4:15 - 6:30 - Rehearsal with Maungsai Somboon for his MFA final project

Sundays

noon - 2:00 - Roller Derby practice

It's going to be another full load. Well, less than 15 credits, but I'm adding roller derby to the mix and still working 20 hours at The Wexner Center. Also, I'll be doing an Independent Study concerning web development for dance sites. This ought to be an interesting quarter!

Upcoming Performance at CCAD

2010-09-05T17:40:00.002-04:00

I will perform with fellow dancers Abby Zbikowski and Amanda Byars at the art opening of Columbus College of Art and Design's Faculty show Wednesday, September 8th in Ric Petry's video installation/performance. Susan VP Petry facilitated the movement. The piece runs 11 minutes and will repeat between 5:00 and 7:00.. One can watch for 11 seconds or 11 minutes!

http://www.ccad.edu/events-2010/faculty-biennial

Preliminary script - "I've Been Watching You" Part One

2010-08-28T14:54:00.004-04:00

I’ve been watching you.

And you

I’m watching.

I see you!

I’m checking you out! Concentrating, contemplating, considering, catching you. I’m keeping my eye on you!

I’ve been watching you.

I’m having a look-see, a listen, a look. I’m laying my eyes on you!

I’m watching you.

I’m examining, evaluating, inspecting, investigating, ogling, googling. I’ve noticed what you’re doing and I’m making a note of that.

I’m following you, facing you. I’m feasting my eyes. I’m taking it all in and giving it the once over. Wow! Get a load of that!

I’m scanning, scoping, scrutinizing, spying, surveying. I’m straight out staring at you. Look, I’m paying close attention. Pay attention! I’m your witness.

I’m watching you……

What I Discovered in Claire Porter's Workshop at Bearnstow

2010-08-28T14:24:00.022-04:00

Now that I've had plenty of time to process my experience, I think it's high time I share my overall thoughts - the big picture if you will about what I've gained.

Reading my submission for funding about why going to Porter's Moving and Writing workshop was important, I have to say - that yes, I got what I was after - to examine storytelling as well as Porter's pedagogical style. What I learned will undeniably influence my final MFA project, but a little clarification is in order. What I was looking for was intentionally general. One can never tell what discoveries will be made at a retreat. That's why retreats exist, right? Here are more specific, important things that I learned:

We didn't study storytelling in the workshop. I knew going in that it wasn't a narrative writing class. Instead, we examined words, which is exactly what I wanted. I have always been leery of using text with movement. Both elements need to stand on their own or one shouldn't combine them. That said, I'm very attracted to voice and movement work that works well together. To me, Porter is a master. Throughout the week, she took us through exercises that allowed us to explore sounds and movements that words can inspire. While I understood the improvisational exercises, I really didn't know where it would take me. Not every attempt worked well for me. By Friday, I think I arrived at a place where something made sense. I had the beginnings of a new solo, that without forcing a narrative, will certainly tell a story. I'm really glad that I took notes on the exercises we went through so I can refer back to them. I also started a reading list based on Porter's library. In this sense my initial requirements and reasoning for funding were fulfilled.
To go further, I also found space. The unique environment of Bearnstow and the peacefulness the land affords gave me room to listen and be ready for ideas and directions. It gave me a chance to see others; to be quiet until it was my time to say something somewhat worth hearing. (I am almost nervous about starting the Fall quarter. So much noise, so many distractions.)
I also had time to do a different kind of writing. I mapped out my professional interests and what I believe in as an artist. I came up with the following mind map for the next couple of years:

I also had the chance to talk one on one with Porter and about how she markets herself as a soloist. I am always amazed by a successful choreographer/soloist. A solo artist has a lot to take on alone. After showing her Bear Traps and Other Impressions I was able to talk to her more extensively about what didn't work this time around. More specifically, we talked about vocal treatment that needs a little work. I'm not sure I'm ready to advertise myself as a soloist, but I do think I have more solo performances that need booking. Solo or not, I discovered that I am nowhere near ready to stop performing. I found this realization reassuring.
Most unexpected were my discussions with Vicki Angel. I keep thinking about the Lincoln Center Institute and how I need to take at least one of their workshops. I'm curious how an artist can maintain artistic vision and still successfully engage in public service. I think my next step is to talk to as many long-established artists regarding their work and how they've maintained their vision. I'm interested in talking with Liz Lerman. Eventually, I want to talk to Bill T. Jones. However lofty these dream conversations may seem, I think both Lerman and Jones (whose Ghostcatching project is in public schools via a partnership with Lincoln Center) could teach me a lot about community and artistic vision. I also can see how my continued conversations with Columbus artists and educators will help me understand the community in which I'm currently involved.

I see a path and I'm breaking into a jog.

Leaving Bearnstow

2010-08-08T19:07:00.004-04:00

Okay, I’ll admit it. It was hard to leave. Seemed strange to share so much in a short amount of time and just get in the car and drive away. Terry Conlon, my passenger/new friend, and I got in the car and drove off at around 10 am. The drive turned out much longer than last week. Traffic was at a crawl in Massachusetts, but so what. We still made it to New Jersey before dark and nothing tragic happened. The long drive gave us plenty of time to review our week with each other and talk about stories from our individual pasts that surfaced along the way. Fascinating how that happens. One goes to a retreat for a specific reason and a ton of unexpected emotions, memories and situations reveal themselves. I wish I could capture that on video. Or maybe I did. We’ll see when I review the videos I took during the week. I’m anxious to see the work I shot and the voices I collected. After hearing Ruth’s stories (Ruth bought the property for $8,000 in 1945 when she was in her twenties!), I have this strong urge to produce a documentary about Bearnstow, but I’m getting way ahead of myself…

The rest of the way back to Columbus will be a solo one. I anticipate replaying Claire saying, “You’re doing good work Rashana” over and over again. And then I’ll think of ways to edit my new solo. As for now, I’m waiting for coffee and for my friend Lindsay to come downstairs so we can get a quick conversation in before I leave again.

(I wrote all the above earlier this morning, but was unable to post till now. I'm home now, fresh with ideas about solo work and my MFA project brewing in my head! Now for laundry and bed!)

Bearnstow 2010 - Day 5

2010-08-07T08:04:00.003-04:00

For our last full day of the workshop we began with a morning movement and vocal warm-up. We told stories to a partner across the room and then shared the stories with the rest of the group. Although they were exercises in projecting our voices, some really interesting stories were told. Some of the stories could have been their own scripts already.

For the rest of the morning and early afternoon, we were left to our own devices. I finished what was to be my first draft of a script. (I still don’t have it titled though.) I gave myself about 125 words to memorize. I was a little worried about this since we were showing our work at 3:30. I used my time to focus on the words, think of a spatial pattern and gather an idea of what kind of movement I was going to perform. I never had a chance to rehearse movement full out. I found myself muttering a lot yesterday - just wandering around imagining what I “might” be doing while I uttered words. (It turned out fine. I improvised movement that wasn’t too complicated and only forgot two words that were probably unnecessary to begin with.)

3:30 rolled around. A few community members who joined us Wednesday at the community center came back to see what we came up with. Overall, I thought we all presented wonderful beginnings of work that I think most of us will continue developing. After showing all the pieces, Claire had us go up to each other and talk about what we saw. I loved this approach! It was like having a cocktail party instead of a straight feedback session where we all take time for one person individually and skim over our reactions. Claire’s approach allowed for more time for everyone and everyone gave feedback. I’m going to have to steal this method!

After dinner – another wonderful, delicious dinner – we convinced Claire to perform for us. We shared our work after all - it was her turn! I am always so amazed by her. So clever this human being. She performed about 20 minutes worth of Namely Muscles, which she will perform next week. I hadn’t seen this one before and I completely loved it. Her character development is always thorough and her performance spot on (of course). I love being reminded why I am so attracted to someone! She’s the kind of performer/choreographer I aspire to become. She seems at home being in front of people, speaking, moving - creating little worlds for the audience to step into. She has a certain…. She just has a way about her that is different than most performers and I don’t quite have the words yet. I’ll get back to you.

Bearnstow 2010 - Day 4

2010-08-05T21:35:00.004-04:00

Yesterday was a relief. I wonder if the fourth day of workshops here are typically like this. Like Monday in a regular week has a certain feel, Wednesday, definitely Friday, of course Sunday – does the arc of workshops play out similarly? Just a curiosity. Here’s how my Thursday at Bearnstow played out:

We worked on theme and variation, starting off by picking movement based on any movement we created earlier in the week and then manipulating it. We moved next to text. We wrote one phrase and worked on variation. Here’s where things took a turn for me. Without painfully searching for something particularly clever to write, words just came to me. “I’ve been watching you.” Many possibilities here. Many comedic possibilities. I finally have a kernel of a new solo that feels relevant. I won’t have a finished product before I leave. Claire isn’t expecting a finished piece by the end of Friday (er, that would be today), so I’m happy.

I must mention a couple of other wonderful happenings today. 1) I had a long discussion with Vicki Angel concerning the Lincoln Center Institute and arts education. Vicki’s participation in this workshop has been a very happy coincidence for me. I see a visit to the LCI in my future! 2) I helped Claire create a Facebook event for her upcoming shows in the New York Fringe Festival. We are also coming up with plans to redesign her website. I'm super psyched about this! (Check out her current website for information about her performances – http://www.cportables.com.)

To sum up my Thursday at Bearnstow, I would have to say I am once again excited about possibilities. I am getting a lot out of this week – not only choreographically, but also professionally. I am inspired! This is why we come to Bearnstow isn’t it?

Bearnstow 2010 - Day 3

2010-08-04T23:13:00.005-04:00

The rain continued through most of the morning, but eventually cleared up to reveal a gorgeous day. During the morning session, we worked with a partner to explore movement and voice at the same time. Eventually we took one movement and word idea and worked on developing it. I kept finding myself changing what I wanted to work on. I came back to the idea that my movement should be able to stand alone without the use of words. I am also reminded about all the physical theatre work I did in Seattle. I think a quick survey about what worked for me might be in order. I felt all over the place today.

During a mid-day respite, I went canoeing to a neighboring island and picked blueberries. While hanging out at the island, I waded in the water and thought of video work. I might try out some ideas tomorrow if I can get someone to man the camera.

I'm hoping for more clarity tomorrow.

Till then...

Bearnstow 2010 - Day 2

2010-08-04T07:04:00.009-04:00

So much happened yesterday that I scarcely think I will get to it all in this little post. First of all - and this is pretty insignificant, or at least I think it is now - the rain started. It eventually let up in time for afternoon swims in the lake, but returned with a vengeance around 10pm. I guess this what Maine is like in the summer.

The morning session was great. We ran through some time honored improvisational warm-ups - follow the leader, mirroring, voice warmups, tongue twisters. We created a sound score based on Monday's writing exercise and from there chose an animal to go along with the sound of the words. Then we paired up and performed duets in an A-B-A structure, using overlapping transitions to connect our solos. I enjoy pairing up and creating duets. The performance of my own material quickly ratchets up when joined with someone else - especially someone with whom I am just beginning to know.

The afternoon session was intense and somewhat intimidating for me. Claire started the second session by announcing that we will be receiving a "present." "Rashana will perform for us." This was not a surprise to me. I asked her if I could show my work and receive feedback. I just didn't expect the word "present" to be associated with my showing. Don't get me wrong - I had something I wanted to offer. I just hoped the viewers would enjoying receiving such a "present."

The reaction to Bear Traps and Other Impressions was completely different than I had experienced. Not a peep out of the eleven observers. The lodge that I performed in was the most intimate of spaces. When I revealed my legs during the last half of my solo, they saw every mosquito bite, bruise and scar. During my performance I peered at them, they peered back. They were definitely watching my solo with critical eyes. I am in fact the youngest attendee at this workshop. My audience has a wealth of experience at watching dance. I didn't expect otherwise, however, during my performance I wondered what I was thinking by revealing so much of myself. Talk about vulnerability.

The feedback:

Claire saw a lot of grief. (I think the crying was more profound in this particular performance space - people commented on it a lot.) She thought some of my vocalization seemed forced and she wasn't sure why I sang. We talked about changing the treatment of my humming. She enjoyed the weightiness of my movement and wanted to see more. She felt like the solo was a psychological exploration.

Liz Keen offered some suggestions of changing the sequence of events, for example starting the piece already in movement. Vicki Angel (also an OSU alum) wanted to see more of each snippet. To her, I just piqued her interest before moving on. I received this comment last spring as well, but like last spring there were others who enjoyed just seeing snippets. Soooo - whatya do? Linn Schlaifer suggested I make it longer. I bemoaned making a solo that was longer than 5-6 minutes and she questioned why. Perhaps I'm not confident yet. Or maybe it depends on the venue. The whole group engaged in a discussion about the title. Due to the heavier interpretation of the solo, I received more serious title suggestions like Mine Fields or Mind Fields. All things to consider. All in all, the "present" at the beginning of the afternoon session was really a gift to me.

After taking up part of class (which admittedly I felt a little bad about), we continued our work with combining words with movement, overlapping transitions and giving/receiving more feedback. Before dinner I spoke with Claire about creating, managing and promoting a solo career. I have a few more ideas about how my MFA project can feed into my work after graduation. The conversation was extremely helpful and useful - yet another gift.

The day finished up beautifully with a spectacular meal - thai fish stew followed by a light and tasty lemon bundt cake. Looking around the table I wondered if I was in the midst of a kind of family reunion. Granted I didn't know these people before arriving at Bearnstow, but I definitely felt like we came from the same stock. Eh, or maybe it was the wine. In any case, it was nice. Also, Olivia, Claire, Liz, Judith and I ended our evening watching episode one of the latest season of Project Runway. So entertaining!

Bearnstow 2010 - Day 1

2010-08-02T21:43:00.003-04:00

Good morning Parker Pond! (This is what I see in the morning.)

Today we worked on Theme, Content, Structure. Claire gave wonderfully useful directives and limitations. We shared our phrases with each other, learned each other's phrases and gave titles to what we saw - one that I might consider using is: Down the Other Street.

Shortly before lunch we were invited to peruse Claire's books. The following are books that I would like to have for myself:

"Action Theatre"

"Acting Games"

"Theatre Games"

"The Art of Comedy"

I had a relaxing nap by the lake (well, they call it a pond) while my feet dangled in the water. Heaven! And then it was back to afternoon class.

What do I want to work on Claire asks. Writing several short (very short) stories and creating work from them. I suppose my theme is Memory. From a particular memory I drew these lines. They were spoken by other dancers as I moved:

She tossed the clean sheets over the hyper chickens.
He told me to move on and then he kissed my hand.
He kissed my hand.
He kissed my hand.
He kissed my hand.
I kissed his hand.

This came from a dream about Woody a couple of months before his passing. Obviously I have a lot of work to do, but this was the first thing to come to mind.

Another highlight of the day - talking to Vicki about taking performances into schools. She is involved in a program that takes Bill T. Jones' Ghost Catcher into schools. I read about this earlier this year and was intrigued. Now I'm in a workshop with one of the people making it happen. I need to find more time to talk with her this week!

One last thing - I asked Claire if I could show her my solo, Bear Traps and Other Impressions. She said absolutely! I show tomorrow before the afternoon session. I'm looking forward to it!

Time to slip under three blankets to prepare for a cold evening/morning. I froze last night! (But I secretly loved it.)

Bearnstow 2010

2010-08-01T21:59:00.005-04:00

I managed to make it to Bearnstow! Two beautiful days of driving and I'm here! There are ten of us taking the workshop and of course Claire Porter leading us. I've enjoyed meeting everyone and getting settled. Each day I'm adding a little reading from Terry Barrett's class. And how fortunate that today I chose the preface to Kitchen Table Wisdom.

At the onset of writing her book, Rachel Naomi Remen was asked by her editor to write an outline. (Remen was unsuccessful with the outline, but successful at putting my mind at rest when it comes to knowing what will come out of this week.)

“What is the book about?” she asked.

I did not know.

“Rachel,” she said. “When you meet a new counseling patient, surely you identify their problem, decide what to do and in what order you need to do it, and make a plan, don’t you?”

I had felt exposed.

“No,” I said. “I don’t know what people need to do or who they need to become. When I first meet with someone, I have no idea where we are going, and where we end up is usually a surprise to us both.”

She sat back in dismay. “Then how do you get quality outcomes?” she asked.

“I just follow the natural process of things."

So that's what I'm going to do....

Summer of Wheels

2010-07-11T22:37:00.005-04:00

This summer I'm training a little differently. Cycling and roller derby. It's all about the wheels!

Summer Time!

2010-07-06T21:20:00.012-04:00

It's been a year since I drove into Columbus - July 4, 2009. It's been an incredibly intense year and now I must admit, I'm really happy that it's summer. While I still have school work and work at the Wexner Center, I'm pleased to have more time at home. David and I are getting to know each other again. We walked to Whetstone Park Sunday to watch fireworks. They were over fast, but they were beautiful. Fifteen-minute fireworks. Sixty minute round trip walk. Invaluable time with the hubbie.

We started clearing out the front yard. This is something I put off doing until I had weekend mornings to devote. Since it's hot out now, I only work in the morning and try my best to stay in the shade. David doesn't seem to mind working in the hot afternoon sun. Right now I'm trying to come up with some kind of analogy to give you a good idea of how much sweat David produces. Horses, pigs... Anyway, I digress. We're finding a lot of plants we didn't know existed underneath all the ornamental grass. This poor yard has been neglected for so many years. It's obvious that at one time the landscaping was quite stunning, however that was several owners ago. So sad. It's hard for David and I to continue living in this house without taking care of the front yard properly. I don't care if it is a rental. Now, if I can only convince our landlord to purchase some mulch....

The other, non-academic noteworthy development is my acceptance into the Ohio Roller Girls Derby team. I'll have more on that later. Tomorrow is my orientation. We're meeting at a bar in German Village. I'm looking forward to working out three times a week with these women. They're sooo going to kick my rear-end.

Media in Performance Overview

2010-06-08T12:32:00.031-04:00

I'm in the process of looking over my Media in Performance class notes, videos and just generally reviewing. Blogging actually helps! You can click on the images if you really want to read my notes.

During the first couple of classes we talked about our experiences with media in performances - what we liked and what we didn't. I talked about working with Lifeforms in the mid-nineties and how for me it was more about coming up with choreographic ideas rather than projecting it during a performance. It was my first taste with integrating software into the choreographic process. My fascination with video editing and animation is ever-present, however Lifeforms is a distant blip on my choreographic EKG.

I enjoyed reading "Saturday." Above are some of my notes. I felt it useful to transcribe some entries that denoted time for me. I'd like to read it again this summer when I have to time to actually savor it! Another reading that was particularly useful and one I will revisit many times I'm sure is Ann Bogart's "A Director Prepares." I wrote about this earlier during the quarter. Here's a quick link to that entry: http://rashanaworks.blogspot.com/2010/05/quick-note-from-reading-1.html. An additional thing I will say about directing - I feel like I move slowly. I want to think it's me trying to be patient, but I'm not quite sure about that. I was a bit frustrated during this process. I couldn't always find the right words for Joda. Some metaphors worked and others did not. I need a directing class. Naturally, I would have loved more rehearsal time.

To the left are notes from our first study. Alexis Del Sol, Joda Lee and I had the task of creating work that utilized a computer monitor (or TV screen). This was particularly challenging. With a projector you have more choices about what to project the images on. With a monitor - that's it. That's your surface. Further, there were some discrepancies about whether we were supposed to use the large TV screen connected to a big tower, a laptop, or smaller computer monitor. I went ahead and used the large TV screen just to make things a little more difficult for myself. Once in place, I couldn't move (what I like to call) the Tower of Technology.

It was heavy and clunky and of course, full of wires. On the other hand, it made me think about the content of the video and the integration of movement by Joda Lee, my dancer for the study. The study was only two minutes. For something so short, I still think I could work more on this without going over two minutes. I wanted more time to direct Joda and investigate more movement options. Time continues to be problematic throughout the quarter. (How interesting that we would start the quarter reading about time!)

Something positive that continued to come up for me during the quarter - video examination. I have elements of Joda examining the video of himself in the first study, of him videotaping himself, of him responding to seeing himself, etc. I have also been examining videos, literally picking them apart - not only for this class, but also for the "Theories of the Body" class. For my final paper in that class, I took three videos and examined camera angles and framing, timing and pacing, and sound in order to determine the motives or intensions for the videos. I'm completely fascinated about how sound can completely alter our "gaze." I just scratched the surface on this idea, but I will be diving into it a lot more this summer during an independent study project.

I found it useful to draw out the space for our final project. I still wish I would have used the space differently, but I felt like, for the purpose of a 12 minute piece that needed to accommodate all three of our pieces, we did okay. At one point there were layers of projections through screens that I really liked, but the logistics of moving those screens for other sections of our final project seemed to overrule the necessity of the layers. I was and still am incredibly intrigued with projecting small images onto objects (or large images onto small objects), however, I would like to do it in an installation environment instead of a traditionally laid out stage space. If anything, this final project gave me more ideas about collaborating with other artists to actually create objects for which to project from and onto.

Below are technical notes for the final showing. I ran lights for Mair, Tiffeny and Kristen. On the left are the notes for those cues. I really enjoyed working with light. I want to do more! I especially think this is important when there's projection on stage. I appreciated Shawn Hove's lighting suggestions - it's amazing how much (light) bounce you can get from white scrims. Too bad I didn't use them.

On the right, are Isadora notes for my group's work. I would have enjoyed working more with Isadora and I definitely can see myself doing this. It's not even a question of "if" - it's "when". Luckily Isadora has great tutorials, so maybe I can work on my own. Shawn mentioned getting Isadora in the media lab. I really hope so! That could be a great class all on its own.

Finally, here are the feedback notes I took after our first showing of our last project. Bebe, as usual, brought up some great questions. I just can't help wondering what this process would have been like if all of us weren't so overcommitted this quarter. Nevertheless, this project was shown and the class is over. I'll see where all this video, projection, lighting, and Isadora-ing will take me next. Or rather, I'll see where I take video, projection, lighting and Isadora!

Pile Up - The Last Show of the School Year!

2010-06-04T09:07:00.004-04:00

Pile Up is the last show this quarter, this school year. Don't miss it! Dante's Chalk Boundaries will be shown again, but augmented to fit the space of Studio One. (I'm performing in this one too. Fun stuff!) Maree ReMalia's and Abby Zbikowski's work will also be shown. I can't wait to see what they've been working on. This showing holds great promise! Make it out tonight for one last hurrah!

See you at 7pm, Sullivant Hall - Studio One - on the OSU campus (High and 15th Street).

Poster credit - Erik Abbott-Main

Three Shows in Two Weeks

2010-05-23T23:05:00.006-04:00

Spring Dance 2010

Two Concerts, Four Nights

Program A:

May 26 & 28 - Wednesday & Friday @ 8:00pm

(I'll perform in Betsy Miller's El Otro Lado/The Other Side and Dante Brown's Chalk Boundaries.)

Program B:

May 27 & 29 - Thursday & Saturday @ 8:00pm

(I'll perform my latest solo, Bear Traps and Other Impressions.)

Both shows are at Sullivant Hall Theatre

1813 N. High Street at 15th Avenue and High Street

Tickets at the door

($10 General Admission, $5 with BuckID)

Poster credit: Bernice Lee

Media in Performance Showings

As part of the Media in Performance class final, we will present a collection of our work. Public is welcome! We would love your feedback. Admission is free!

Thursday, June 3, 2010, 5:30pm - 8:30pm

The Ohio State University, ACCAD Building, Emma Lab

Get a hold of me for directions.

Photo credit: Rashana Smith, Performer: Tsung-Hsin Lee

Pile Up

Come see an informal showing of new dance works presented by MFA candidates Dante Brown, Maree ReMalia, and Abigail Zbikowski. (I'll perform in Dante's Chalk Boundaries.)

Friday, June 4, 2010, 7:00pm - 9:00pm

The Ohio State University, Sullivant Hall, Studio 1

1813 N. High Street at 15th Avenue and High Street

Free Admission!

Poster credit: Erik Abbott-Main

Last Few Weeks

2010-05-19T23:13:00.002-04:00

Almost done.

Hard Quarter.

Hard Year.

Too much.

Sleep deprived.

But

Growing.

Hopeful.

Finally! The last set of readings (#8)

2010-05-09T13:59:00.005-04:00

From the Forward written by Richard Shaull in Paulo Freire's book Pedagogy of the Oppressed:

"I am encouraged when a man of the stature of Paulo Freire incarnates a rediscovery of the humanizing vocation of the intellectual, and demonstrates the power of thought to negate accepted limits and open the way to a new future. ...Freire is able to do this because he operates on one basic assumption: that man's ontological vocation (as he calls it) is to be a Subject who acts upon and transforms his world, and in so doing moves towards ever new possibilities of fuller and richer life individually and collectively. This world to which he relates in not a static and closed order, a given reality which man must accept and to which he must adjust; rather, it is a problem to be worked on and solved."

In addition to this book, I perused articles regarding Freire's work in preparation to helping lead a class next week regarding Pedagogy of the Oppressed. The articles were quite helpful in giving good examples of how to engage students in the classroom. Freire's work centered around adult education in Third World countries, but the same can be applied in many educational systems. I think this will assist me a lot in my teaching at Easthaven Elementary school (something I realize I haven't even mentioned on this blog until now). Most notable about Freire's book, well - the chapter I read most intently (chapter 2), was his idea of the "banking" concept opposed to problem-posing concept in education. This relates most directly to "teacher-centered" opposed to "student-centered" instruction that was discussed earlier in the quarter. Right now, I really just want more experience putting these ideas into action. Relevance, relevance.

Okay, with my readings done, it's time get something to eat and ready myself for four hours of rehearsal after which I will come home and start writing multiple papers. (Come on summer!)

Quick Note from Reading #7

2010-05-09T10:39:00.007-04:00

So this is a big 'un. A lot more complex. Harder to understand. Theoretical, etc. Judith Butler's book Gender Trouble. Here's my selected quote:

"The theories of feminist identity that elaborate predicates of color, sexuality, ethnicity, class, and able-bodiedness invariably close with an embarrassed "etc." at the end of the list. Through this horizontal trajectory of adjectives, these positions strive to encompass a situated subject, but invariably fail to be complete. This failure, however, is instructive: what political impetus is to be derived from the exasperated "etc." that so often occurs at the end of such lines? This is a sign of exhaustion as well as of the illimitable process of signification itself. It is the supplement, the excess that necessarily accompanies any effort to posit identity once and for all. This illimitable et cetera, however, offers itself as a new departure for feminist political theorizing."

Okay - I had to read this over and over again. I gather that what she means is that the notion of a "subject" (man or woman) for Butler is formed through repetition, through a "practice of signification." Butler uses examples of "parody" (drag for example) that shake up normative ideas and make apparent the invisible assumptions about gender identity. There are illimitable (i.e. in the et cetera) ways of asserting one's identity. According to Butler, positive politics can emerge from redeploying practices of identity and exposing failed attempts to "become" one's gender.

Hmmm. Chew on that for awhile. Today I have rehearsals for my own choreography which I initially termed "Gender in Choreography" however as of last quarter I started thinking of it merely as "Identity Studies" and in this quarter, because of my use of video as the medium in which to present my work, I think of this project as "How We Perceive Identity." It's never-ending....

Quick Note from Reading #6

2010-05-08T22:53:00.003-04:00

From "is any body home?" embodied imagination and visible evictions, I pull this quote:

"Our culture's increasing valorization of the visible has greatly reduced the sensual thickness of lived experience to a single and dare I say soulless dimension."

A few things are running through my head, mostly images of.... well, images. Thursday I posted a manipulated photograph of myself to represent how I felt at the time. I was thinking about intensity and about how I would see the manipulated photograph and how my eyes in the photograph might reflect how I see. On a more embodied level, I am working with this in my solo Bear Traps and Other Impressions when I stand on stage looking at people in the audience; seeing them see me see them and then I proceed to play through different scenarios of how I feel perceived or the excuses I might make for my first impressions. The act of performing this solo is my attempt at addressing my lived experience, regardless of how it is perceived by the audience.

Quick Note from Reading #5

2010-05-08T20:52:00.007-04:00

This year I have had the awesome opportunity to work with Maree ReMalia through her choreographic work and now as someone helping her document her process. Tonight I took some time to re-read a draft of her MFA project proposal. From her proposal, I offer this quote which I think is timely:

"In her book, A Director Prepares, Anne Bogart discusses distortion and states that the 'instantly definable is instantly forgettable.'" (How wonderful that I was just reading that this morning.) This quote says so much about Maree's process. Being in her rehearsals, I can attest to Maree's use of distortion. Having performed in Within a Formal Circumstance I have first hand knowledge of enjoying the work by discovering what issues come up for me personally instead of Maree telling me what to feel. Read more about Within a Formal Circumstance on her blog at http://mahiree.wordpress.com/mfa-project-rehearsallabs/.

Photo credit: Tsung-Hsin Lee

Quick Note from Reading #4

2010-05-08T19:06:00.003-04:00

"Rethinking Women's Ways of Knowing: Gender Commonalities and Intersections with Postformal Thought"

Geesh. That's a long title. Normally I might be all over this because the whole article discusses differences between men and women. I found though that I had a hard time discerning the actual findings of the studies since the most recent study tested the theories of a previous study. Or maybe because I'm a woman I found the whole article dry and separate from my own experience or way of knowing. Ha!

Quick Note from Reading #2 and #3

2010-05-08T17:10:00.005-04:00

From "How to Write a Statement of Teaching Philosophy" posted in The Chronicle of Higher Education:

"Do I even have a teaching philosophy?"

Why, yes, I sort of do. Well, it's a first draft. There are a couple of things in there I need to clarify and obviously, it's a general philosophy. Depending on the places I would apply to when I'm back on the job market, I will need to tweak the statement. http://www.rashanaworks.com/classes.html.

From Jan Erkert's "Harnessing the Wind" - I don't have a response since the assignment was to review the example of a syllabus. It outlines a format of necessary information. Pretty straightforward.

Quick Note from Reading #1

2010-05-08T16:08:00.011-04:00

Just to personally give me a little time to reflect after all the reading I'm going to do today, I thought I would pick one quote out of each reading and post something. We'll see how it goes - cuz really - nothing ever turns out how I imagine (i.e. proposing to post twice a week - ha!).

From Anne Bogart's "A Director Prepares:"

"It's not about the right idea or even the right decision, rather it is about the quality of decisiveness."

I find it is much easier for me to be decisive when performing my own work, but much less decisive when directing others. Frankly, it's frightening to me - and maybe that's a good thing. Now I just need to enter into the unknown and start making stabs at what I'm thinking. To say or do "nothing" is to present "nothing."

Photo credit: Shawn Hodges

More Wine Please

2010-05-06T22:04:00.004-04:00

Okay, things are getting pretty tense nowadays. I putzed around in Photoshop for a few minutes tonight before getting back to obligations. I can't wait for summer....

Wednesdays

2010-04-21T09:05:00.005-04:00

"There is a force within that gives you life - Seek that.
In your body there lies a priceless jewel - Seek that.
Oh, wandering One,
if you are in search of the greatest treasure,
don't look outside.
Look within, and seek That."

- Rumi, was a Sufi Mystic & Poet.

I'm beginning to really enjoy Wednesday mornings. It has become a time NOT to do coursework, but to take care of myself. This can mean a nice long shower, stretching, yoga, catching up on watching videos, cleaning house or just being quiet and watching people walk down the sidewalk in front of my house. I wish I had more Wednesday mornings. One day.....

Video from Rehearsal with Chafin No. 1

2010-04-19T00:55:00.004-04:00

Below is a video from the first rehearsal with Chafin. I started playing with in-camera editing and overlaying existing sound from other clips. I plan to continue working on interview-type clips and dance clips to see what I come up with in regards to "identity" related issues. While I call this project "gender in choreography," it's really all about identity. Gender just so happens to fall within it. I like where this is going.

Methinks I Had a Weekend

2010-04-19T00:43:00.005-04:00

It's going on 1am, but I'm not my usually dogged-self at this hour. I had a pretty good weekend. I actually spent time with David! Aside from a few hours at Sullivant Hall for rehearsal Saturday, I hung out with my husband - go figure. It was a welcomed change.

Today I got some work done in preparation for the week. I still have a lot more to do, but I'm having faith that I'll find time for everything important. (I'm learning that NOT everything is important. I'm picking my own personal battles in other words.)

Here's the video I worked on today for the Media in Performance class.

Two Things

2010-04-14T09:29:00.004-04:00

Quick blog for the week. I'm still struggling to find time for everything, including time to decompress. This morning I had to watch an episode of "Castle" on hulu.com for example just to zone out.

Two things I've discovered this week:

1. I must like working with video. I'll stay up for hours working on things I don't even end up using. But I like it.

2. My body isn't killing me anymore. I think the weather helps. I also think Karl's modern class works well for me. Rehearsals can get strenuous, but they're definitely manageable.

Below is a video I created for texture. (I'm not using it for its intended purpose - I might not use it all, but here it is.)

Spring is Helpful

2010-04-07T09:27:00.009-04:00

Monday I wasn't able to blog because I used the morning to catch up from a busy weekend. I can't believe I was actually prepared for Monday night's class and Tuesday's Media in Performance class. I had two books to read in a week for these classes, reading responses to write, videos to shoot, etc. Monday night I stayed up until 3:30am mixing a video I didn't even show. But I had fun. And that's my point. I'm having fun, despite all the long hours and work. Spring is here and I'm optimistic!

This morning I started off with meditation and stretching, a little photography (see the pear tree below) and some reflection about how I'm going to get through another 12 hour school day.

(The picture of the Spring Buddha was taken by David.)

Lastly, here's the video of my latest solo, "Bear Traps and Other Impressions." I shot the video, then gathered still shots, then made it back into a video. Hmm. Could all my theory classes be getting to me, because this seems pretty deconstructive.

Now off to Karl Rogers's modern technique class!

The Gift of Morning

2010-03-31T09:09:00.004-04:00

It's after 9am and I am so happy to have enjoyed a little bit of peace before starting another day of endless tasks. Yoga was sweet this morning. Happy and peaceful. Hopefully I will carry it with me throughout the day.

Oh, hey, I just realized that today I get to attend a master class by Noh Theatre artist, Toshinori Hamada. Nice!

Off to class, work at The Wex, a couple of hours of celebrating Alexis's birthday, then a ton of reading and writing before bed.

That's a complete day right there!

Spring Quarter 2010 and YoBB

2010-03-29T08:54:00.007-04:00

"The tragedy of life is not death rather it is what we allow to die within us while we live." - Norman Cousins

Today I start classes for Spring Quarter. I also continue what I like to call YoBB, which is short for: yoga, breakfast, blogging. I hope to be able to keep this up every Monday and Wednesday before I head out to classes. Last quarter I tried to find a semi-daily physical practice. But, as there is no "try," only "do" - I wasn't doing very well.

Back to Donna Farhi's wise words I go.

"Of the nine obstacles to the yogic path listed in the Yoga-Sutra, four can be attributed in some way to the effects of dullness, laziness, and inertia. Sloth makes it almost impossible to establish a firm ground for practice, and even if we are able to do so, sloth may prevent us from sustaining any ground we have gained. Most of us have a sense of what's good for us. This knowledge of the medicine we need bypasses the central dilemma: How are we going to get to the medicine cabinet?"

Yesterday, on my last day of Spring Break, I charted this idea of starting at least two days a week with yoga, breakfast and following it up with blogging. After going through my practice yesterday, I realized it was much like finally having food for my body after being hungry for a long time. I had a great day yesterday, partly because of my attitude, but largely because I took care of myself. So, my way to the medicine cabinet will be to change my priorities - GET 8 HOURS of sleep, attend to my needs in the morning, give David a kiss as I leave the house, then give OSU all I can offer.

Twyla Tharp suggests that forming a ritual is essential to the creative process. (Check out her book, The Creative Habit.) I think it's imperative to changing my lifestyle, not just for grad school but for myself.

It's 9:15. Time to pack a lunch and head out to school. Till next time....

Spring Quarter Begins Tomorrow

2010-03-28T21:15:00.005-04:00

Winter Quarter was pretty intense. I feel like I should summarize it, but Spring Quarter is beginning TOMORROW! No time to sit around here and reflect. Hopefully I'll have time this summer to go over my first year in graduate school. Spring Break wasn't incredibly noteworthy except for a few things. 1) I visited Easthaven Elementary to prepare for an upcoming workshop (which I guess is kind of exciting because I'm looking forward to it). 2) David's friend, Chuck, came to visit a few days. 3) I finally finished the guest bedroom windows and I'm happy about it. Here's a pic:

Tomorrow I start the following schedule (more or less):

Monday

10:30 - noon Modern Technique

12:30 - 4:30 Work at the Wex

5:00-8:00 Theories of the Body

Tuesday

8:45 - 10:15 Teaching Seminar

10:30 - 2:30 Work at the Wex

3:00 - 5:00 Media in Performance

6:30 - 9:00 Rehearsals

Wednesday

10:30 - noon Modern Technique

12:30 - 5:30 Work at the Wex

Thursday

8:45 - 10:15 Teaching Seminar

10:30 - 2:30 Work at the Wex

3:00 - 5:00 Media in Performance

Friday

4:30 - 6:00 Production class for Spring Concert

Saturday

1-3 Rehearsal for solos

Wish me luck!

New Design Published

2010-03-15T23:16:00.003-04:00

The new web design is now occupying http://www.rashanaworks.com. Check it out! I still have some things to fill in, some videos to post, things about Motor Dance, etc, but it's live.

Tomorrow I show my solo "Bear Traps & Other Impressions" for my Dynamics & Phrasing Final. Maybe I'll post that after I finish my take home exam for Postmodernism - only 17 pages. I feel sick already.

Onward though! I can't wait for Thursday when it's all done!

Website for Interactive Media class

2010-03-15T01:37:00.004-04:00

Here's the link to the redesign of rashanaworks:

http://accad.osu.edu/~rashana/rashanaworks/index.html

There are a couple of things I want to change/reconfigure, but this is what I'm turning in for my final.

Chafin's Solo

2010-03-12T07:11:00.003-05:00

Here's the solo I'm learning:

Seedling

2010-03-11T18:08:00.008-05:00

Seedling is a video short I created for the MFA Spring Perspectives show at the Urban Arts Center, an OSU gallery space in downtown in Columbus. The video will show at the entrance of the gallery and will play continuously in a loop. It is meant to evoke curiosity and encourage visitors to learn more about the work created by the MFA students who are presenting their work. Hope you enjoy. (I just looked at this after it posted. After posting the quality is incredibly degraded. Nevertheless - the DVD is much better so you should just come to the show and see it for yourself!)

I Feel Spring

2010-03-10T07:41:00.005-05:00

Last night was the first night in a while that it was warm when I took Pai for her last walk of the evening. It took me a while to understand why the houses looked different - there weren't banks of snow covering their front yards! It actually felt like Fall. As we passed one house, I noticed a cowboy hat on the ground where a snowman used to stand. Yeah seasons!!!!!

Now back to finishing papers and final projects. Spring Break is around the corner!

Snow Day - February 16, 2010

2010-02-16T09:53:00.003-05:00

Yah, I know - enough with the dog! It's just that I love seeing her play in the snow and we have so much of it.

Next Phase of Gender in Choreography and some thoughts

2010-02-13T18:30:00.007-05:00

For the most part Chalk Boundaries rehearsals are over. There may be some involvement in the female cast, but I'm not sure how this will all work out. I posted some clips from a rehearsal with the guys.

Today I found Chafin's solo on tape - I start rehearsing this week. I'm excited about it, but a little a nervous at the same time. I'm slightly afraid of embarrassing myself. Luckily I feel like my knees are getting better and other aches are subsiding. Onward!

Friday night's performance by the Merce Cunningham Dance Company was an eye opener. I appreciated the program's variety - 1960's Crises and 2003's Split Sides. They were so different to me. David slept through about 80% of Crises, but absolutely loved Split Sides. David was really curious about what were distinguishing Cunningham movements - how could I tell it was Cunningham work? We both talked about the shifts in direction, the balances on one leg, the awkward jumps and hops, the "kicking" (as David put it), the placement of the arms. I used to think of Cunningham's work as mostly technical. This is the second time I have seen Cunningham's work in person and this time I sat a lot closer and was blown away by the individual dancers. This time I saw their faces. In fact, a couple of times it looked like some of them were smiling - as if they enjoyed what they were doing! I found it delightful and was happy to see them as individuals. Split Sides also offered an easier way in for David and I. The music was Radiohead and Sigor Ros and I think that helped. Plus there was so much going on all the time - the cast was much larger. The chance operation was intriguing.

From all this inquiry about Cunningham's particular style, David wondered how people would know that my choreography was mine. I turned it back to him to answer and his response was, "Someone's getting pushed." What about my solos? "You move as if someone has pushed you."

I couldn't help but laugh.

Merce Cunningham Legacy Tour Kicks-off Tonight!

2010-02-12T18:40:00.001-05:00

Right now I'm biding my time until the Pre-Performance talk before Merce Cunningham's company takes the stage at Mershon Auditorium. I can't wait to listen to Karen Elliot and David Covey speak about their experiences working with Cunningham. I am constantly in awe that I attend a school who have faculty such as these. The lives they have lived, my goodness! And I get to learn from them?! I can't believe how fortunate I am.

Oh, and I'm really excited to see Cunningham's company too. I'm a little bummed that I missed the master class - the sign up came and went before I ever knew it was offered. I enjoyed hearing from those who did take the class though - I only heard positive things from them. I'm always surprised that not more dancers have taken his technique. It makes me think I've been around longer than I realize.

On days like today, with Cunningham's influence so near, I really miss Kate Warren. But that's another story.

Now - off to the show!

Catching Up

2010-02-09T22:22:00.001-05:00

I've gotten a little behind on blogging about my Gender in Choreography study even though it's only been a week since my last confession... er... I mean post. A lot has happened in a week - naturally.

Rehearsal #6 - February 3rd
The guys rehearsed on stage and I did my best not to hop up and dance with them. I really wanted to though. Since I'm not performing however, I needed to stay out of their way. A couple of observations - Eric's vocalization resonated, literally. I felt his voice. It's amazing how a man's voice can carry in a way a woman's does not. Dante changed the words to: "Down. Set. Girl." - as in football. I liked the change. It held more meaning for me - like the act of finding a girl as a sport - which to me had good connotations as well as bad. I'm noticing that being around all this testosterone is starting to affect me a bit. When I get home I want to rough-house with David, as in wrestle him to the ground and slug him a little. Poor guy - to him, it always comes out of left field. I'm trying to restrain myself.

Brenda Dixon-Gottschild

That's right - I said Brenda Dixon-Gottschild. She gave a couple of talks Thursday, the 4th. While her name seems unexpected for this post, it's right on target. Her morning talk touched on appropriation and what it means to take movement from another culture/heritage. In my Postmodern readings, I enjoyed Jane Desmond's article, "Embodying Difference: Issues in Dance and Cultural Studies." I especially liked the section which discusses transmission in appropriation. I will never be able to dance like a man, but what happens when I take movement crafted for a man and put it on my body? What does that transmission look like? How does it change?

Dress Rehearsal #7 - February 6th
The guys finally got the chance to step onto the Mershon stage. I waited for this moment for a long time - the moment when they realized just how massive that stage is. Their running patterns were going to be much longer. I was happy to see that they responded the same way I would (as in - "Oh crap!"). Again, I filled the role of observer, gave feedback, and ran the sound. I love watching rehearsals, but at the same time I still found this to be a frustrating place. And then it dawned on me - what I would like to do is to perform in an all male piece - not to pass myself off as a man, but to see if I can keep up with them or run in their pack. Right now I'm learning about their rehearsal dynamic with an outside eye but maybe performing will be the next step?

Super Sunday, February 7th
The guys rocked their performances. Quite honestly, I was struck by their athleticism. Also, after going through the Hard Targets exhibit at the Wexner I left quite enamored by the different shades of masculinity. Looking at Wladimir Klitschko sitting square in front of a video lens staring down at me, made me a bit uneasy. The tension between me and the screen seemed real. He was motionless for the most part, so I felt a little safe - until he moved slightly and I realized it was a video instead of a photograph. He exuded power, strength and looked like he could knock my block off. Oddly, I found this fascinatingly mesmerizing. What is this thing, "maleness?"

Parting Thoughts
There's more that I've discovered this week, but I need to end this post sometime. Eventually I'll post videos. In fact, there are a couple of old videos I want to post but need to get the rights to do so. I'm starting to track my fascination with this topic. It goes further back than I imagined.

A Couple of Quotes to Inspire Change

2010-02-02T13:51:00.002-05:00

"Attempt the impossible in order to improve your work." - Bette Davis

"Defeat is a state of mind. No one is ever defeated untildefeat has been accepted as reality. To me, defeat in anything is merely temporary, and its punishment is but an urge for me to greater effort to achieve my goal. Defeat simply tells me that something is wrong in my doing; it is a path leading to success and truth." - Bruce Lee

This week has been a tough one already. I feel behind on everything and my body wants to sleep. I don't feel like I have the time to do anything well. I am hoping to turn some of this around - as in re-evaluate what I think I'm trying to accomplish. If it's discovery - then yes, I think I'm discovering a lot. If it's crafting my best choreography or whipping out my best performance in class, then maybe no. Maybe it doesn't always have to be about excellence.

On a side note, I adjusted my morning ritual ... again. I can't manage to get up in time to include mat exercises before class. I've maintained my stretches and a little meditation in the morning though. Instead of the mat exercises, I've started walking again. It snowed last night, but it's sunny and by this afternoon the snow had melted. Maybe the weather will continue to get better. Walking before class for 30 minutes seems to help a lot. Oh, and not that it's noticeable, I'm dropping weight consistently each week. This will help the knees too!

Now - off to attempting the impossible. Dynamics and Phrasing starts in 45 minutes and I'm still struggling with my phrase!

Gender in Choreography - Fourth and Fifth Rehearsals

2010-01-26T23:52:00.001-05:00

January 20th
I have to really laugh at myself when I'm being a complete idiot. I scurried from class to the locker room to change for rehearsal only to ram my head rather forcefully into a metal locker door. There's something about a bleeding skull that makes me angry. So here I was, alone in the women's locker room at 7:45 at night, holding my head, muttering obscenities and trying really hard not to cry. I wasn't very successful. I splashed water on my face hoping to keep it from turning that pitiful splotchy red color because I didn't want the guys to know I cried. I kept thinking, "There's no crying in baseball!"

I walked into rehearsal as non-chalant as possible. Michael kind of looked at me funny but didn't say anything. Somehow I thought I was in the clear. Later, Eric came over and calmly asked me how I was doing. I said, "Ah, yeah. I'm doing good. How are you?" To which he replied in his naturally sensitive and caring voice, "Fine. I just noticed that your face was really red and I wondered if you were okay." So I just let it spill what happened. Eric was concerned about me and at one point commented that he was feeling really protective of me and wasn't sure why.

So here's my point to all this - sometimes there's no avoiding the gender roles we end up playing.

January 23rd
Saturday's rehearsal has been my most favorite by far. I videotaped a couple of the phrases so that I can work on my timing a little more. These guys drop their weight differently than I do and my timing is off. The interesting thing about this rehearsal though was my filling in for Eric's role and having to yell, "Girl!" This was fun, however very confusing when the guys started sniffing the air as if they were dogs. It was easy for me to yell GIRL!, but when all the guys behind me started sniffing, I automatically felt really self-conscious. I know I was supposed to be sniffing too, but it wasn't my first inclination. My first inclination was to cover my butt. After the first time, I think we all laughed at the strangeness of the situation - after all, I was supposed to be Eric and he wouldn't have had the same reaction. I remember laughing and turning around to look at them and noticing that they had all backed away from me. Dante posted a video on his blog - check it out http://dnbdance.wordpress.com.

Another Lesson in Effort & Surrender

2010-01-25T21:40:00.000-05:00

"Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it." - Henry David Thoreau

Hmmm. I came across this quote and I think I have a problem with it. I wonder if Thoreau's idea of busy is a little different than mine. If one is too busy to be looking for success, would he also be too busy to notice that he achieved success?

Last week I decided to continue certain rituals in order to keep myself grounded and to further rehab for my knee. I managed to maintain certain stretches, but couldn't keep up with the mat exercises because I just plain didn't have time in the morning. I feel like time shifts so easily beneath my feet. Sometimes I am able to stand up on it as it moves beneath me and other times I am totally sunk. I just keep trying to do the best I can, which sometimes means getting 15 minutes more of sleep which doesn't account for the hour or two I'm behind. Sleep is very important to me the older I get. Likewise, change seems to take longer. Could it be that I'm just trying to slow down in order to recognize the changes?

Whatever is going on, I think the issue I have with time, also has to do with when to make effort and when to let go. There's a reason for savasana at the end of an intense yoga class...

Art and Fear

2010-01-18T02:44:00.001-05:00

Last quarter I engaged in a regular yoga practice twice a week, along with also blogging about it twice a week. This quarter, it's not as simple to find my physical practice. The two technique classes really aren't meant as "physical practice" in the traditional mode of practicing the same concepts each day - as in sun salutation or tendues at the barre. The modern classes I take vary from day to day - which I like - however I see the need for consistency in order to anchor myself. After registration completed, I have 20 credit hours. This is insane. The busiest classes for me aren't actually classes - they're independent studies that only account for 1 credit each. I have five independent studies and I'm happy about them all. Nevertheless...

After pondering on this little dilemma, I think I came up with an idea. I need to get my mat out every morning and work on some core issues for myself. I'll pick one topic each week and build on them. And, as I enjoyed Michael Morris's approach of taking literary inspiration and applying to my own life, I will also pick a quote or passage and share that in my blog. The passages I draw from won't necessarily be yoga-centered, but will most likely draw from books I read for my other classes. In other words, I will relate certain issues to my own physical practice as another way of embodying what I'm learning here.

So I will start now. It's a quote from a book I'm reading for the Dynamics and Phrasing class, "Art and Fear" by David Bayles and Ted Orland.

"What separates artists from ex-artists is that those who challenge their fears, continue; those who don't, quit."

I don't want to quit. Today I was completely discouraged by the status of my knee. I'm a bit angry that I can't seem to get my body into the shape I want. Plus, I have a final draft due for my Dynamics and Phrasing class which means I need to perform Tuesday. Perhaps this is another detour, a challenge to get past my fear that my body can't keep up, and a chance to let go of things that are holding me back. Perhaps I can see this as a certain kind of restriction that actually frees me to focus on other things and find creative solutions that I might not have seen before.

Tomorrow I plan on continuing my morning ritual of stretches in bed before rising, foot exercises once out of bed, and then going through a pilates mat session that will take the weight off my legs. I'll take the dog for a short walk to test out the knee and then head to the studio to see how I'm going to do this.

So here it goes...

Gender in Choreography, Second and Third Rehearsals

2010-01-16T19:53:00.001-05:00

This week I continued going to the gym. I had no choice if I wanted to keep up in Chalk Boundaries. We had two rehearsals this week. In the midst of it all, my left quadriceps muscle became overworked and started pulling at my patella tendon, causing swelling in my left knee. I found this disturbing because I felt like I just started! Thankfully I was able to see Robin in the Wellness Center. She manipulated the swelling down and determined that I didn't pull any ligaments or tendons. What a relief! After solid sleep last night, my knee now feels like 95%. I'm so relieved. (I mean - how embarrassing!)

January 13th - Second Rehearsal
This was kind of a bust. Rehearsal was changed from 7:30 to 7:00, but I didn't get that memo. Because I travel from West campus following my Interactive Media class that gets out at 7:18, I was extremely late - later than I thought I would have been. The guys were already in the midst of working on a group partnering section that I couldn't easily slip into. I felt pretty useless - there wasn't much I could do and consequently, didn't get the opportunity to dance. I experienced this odd wave of separateness run over me. The guys were dancing. I was not. Was this a conspiracy??? Of course not. But I really wanted the coach to put me in the game. Rehearsals just don't work that way though. I went home at 9pm and worked another 3 hours towards straining my quadriceps.

January 16th - Third Rehearsal
Aside from being a little tentative about a few movements because of my knee - I felt pretty good. We were in Studio 1 and were able to use more space, dance bigger and cover more ground. The guys seemed more receptive to me being an auxiliary member. Some jokes were cracked about movement vocabulary (things I won't post on my blog) and I did my best not to giggle like a little girl at their guy humor.

Right now I'm in the media lab on a Saturday night blogging about these rehearsals. Where is my life going - 8pm on a Saturday night - on a three day weekend!

Dante is busy posting videos from rehearsals. Besides having an all-male cast, he also has an all-female cast. He comes up with the movement for the men, sets the movement on them and then sets that same movement on the women. I just happen to be rehearsing with the men to see what the difference is for me physically. I watched the video from the all-female cast. Wow! The quality is so different! The guys step wider, jump higher - suspending more in the air. The women are quicker, their steps shorter and their arms seem to float. This is getting interesting! I can't wait till the next rehearsal!

I have more topics to blog. Till next time~

Gender in Choreography - Independent Study

2010-01-16T18:43:00.003-05:00

The purpose of Gender in Choreography is for me to learn three works choreographed BY men specifically FOR men and to document the process. I want to see how my body interprets the movement. I'm particularly curious about what it is like as a woman to slip into masculine-specific movement - what is achievable, what is transformable and what is unattainable.

I'll use this blog to document weekly rehearsals for myself and also for my advisor, Melanie Bales. I'll start this off with the first piece I'm working with, Chalk Boundaries, choreographed by Dante Brown. This piece is an all male ensemble currently in rehearsal for the February 7th Super Sunday event for the Hard Targets exhibition at the Wexner Center. You can read more about Brown's process on his blog: http://dnbdance.wordpress.com. While I am not performing at the Super Sunday event, I am fully involved in the rehearsals. Thankfully Dante has been really cool with this idea!

January 6th - First rehearsal
I liked being a little invisible as I danced around the all male cast, which happens to be Mike Abbatiello, Dante Brown, Quentin Burley, Eric Nordstrom and Chafin Seymour. Aside from Nordstrom, most of the dancers are in their early twenties - if that. I think I'm older than two of them put together. So, not only is this a gender study, but it's also an age study.

I spent most of rehearsal observing myself observing. I really didn't think being a "minority" in a rehearsal would bring up so many memories of growing up with an older brother and wanting desperately to play with the big boys. But that's exactly how I felt. I maintained my distance in this first rehearsal though - which wasn't hard. I think the undergraduate dancers were a little wary of me - they didn't know me and probably didn't understand why I wanted to be a part of their all-male experience.

I continued to run through more internal questioning, like - what does it mean to be a man? I wondered if men had the same question. All these guys were clearly individuals and I bet they'd answer that question differently as well. Why is this question so fascinating to me? I feel like I've been asking myself this question a lot the older I get. I know what I like in men - but why do I like those qualities? Would I still like those qualities if I were also a man? Also, is it just their physical strength that makes men dance differently or is it their gender that asserts other qualities. I noticed an obvious difference in the dynamics of the cast as opposed to a mixed or all female cast. The men took up a lot more room and they didn't gossip. I liked this!

Eventually memories of dancing in Heywood "Woody" McGriff's Dig came flashing back at me. I remembered how much I enjoyed the athleticism in his choreography. I remembered how I wanted to jump as high as he did and command the space the same way he did. Maybe I just like this kind of strong, athletic movement. And why not?

More to come!

First of Week of Winter Quarter 2010

2010-01-07T22:52:00.004-05:00

I think I'm starting to realize that I'm in graduate school now and am feeling a little more relaxed by the idea. I'm not as stressed, but of course - it's only the first week. Here's how it's going so far:

I'm going to the gym three days a week now. It's going to take some time for my body to come out of shock, but I think I'll start liking it eventually. I'm sore... of course.

Susan Hadley's modern technique class is really challenging. I can tell that she used to dance in Mark Morris's company. She's really focused on musicality. I have to be hyper-aware or I'll miss something. She announced that she's creating the movement for class in class as we go along in order to pay attention to what we need. In this way, it reminds me of Kate Warren. They are both incredibly detail-oriented and focused on getting their students to pay attention to the nuances of the movement. Hadley also reminds me of Lynne Grossman - so entertaining. Don't get me wrong, though - I think Hadley is unique and I'm looking forward to seeing how my dancing may change by the end of this quarter because of her eagle eye.

It's too early to say what I think of the Interactive Media class. It's only been a couple of classes and they were really slow. Yesterday Patterson covered DNS servers and the back-end of websites, i.e. webservers. I spent years managing this technology and it was really hard to sit patiently through this class, although I know it's necessary in an intro class. I just wonder if I should be there. Perhaps it will pick up.

I like the fact that I'm taking two modern technique classes this quarter. Bebe Miller's approach is different from Hadley's but certainly just as exacting. Miller's classes so far have had a different warm-up each time. I really appreciate how these teachers are careful to look at what we need and are able to adjust accordingly. I know that must sound elementary, but it's a big thing really. Plus, I'm totally fascinated by Miller. Where did this wonder come from? How fortunate that I get to take her class for 10 weeks - not just a week long workshop!

Dynamics and Phrasing - Comp Class with Vicki Blaine. This will be challenging. It's not just a composition class (neither was John Giffin's last quarter); it's also a performance class. The restrictions that will be placed on us will probably be uncomfortable, but I think this could be a good thing. How can we learn from our suffering??? I guess I'll find out.

I still haven't had Postmodernism yet - it meets tomorrow if classes aren't cancelled due to weather. It's a three hour class at 9am on a Friday. I've already completed my reading for tomorrow and I really like the topics already, so I think I might like it. We'll see... Three hour class on a Friday. (That keeps echoing in my head.)

Enough about classes. My next post will be about the Independent Study I started that I'm really excited about. For some reason, this quarter seems to be more about physicality for me. I feel like I'm traveling down a curvy road. I don't know where I'm going, but I like what I see along the way!

Stay tuned.
For now - I'm going to bed!

Pictures from New Year's Eve Party

2010-01-02T14:20:00.005-05:00

The Super New Year party was fun!

Here's a look at the Super Heroes and Villians who showed up:

The Last Post of 2009

2009-12-31T10:25:00.008-05:00

The final day of the year is upon us. I guess I could do a little retrospective of the year, however, I'm currently filled with excitement of the day. I keep seeing so many possibilities for 2010 and am happy that I don't know what will happen. That's what thrills me the most - anything can happen! I'm hoping for positive outcomes of course - whatever that means.

For today, I will be busy will little mundane tasks interspersed with creative ones like figuring out my Super Hero costume for Erik's party. Right now David is creating his death ray gun...

Great Day for Laughter

2009-12-30T23:04:00.014-05:00

Today was my last day of work for the year 2009. That's a fun thought all on its own. I also had lunch with Betsy. We amused ourselves at the thought of costumes for tomorrow's Super New Year costume party at Erik's. (Here's Betsy, me and Amanda at the last costume party.)

After work I hung out with Eric and Michael for some hula hooping and dancin' around the studio. (Here's a cool shot of Michael doing what he likes to do right now....)

(And here's a picture of Erik and I performing at The Wexner Center for the Super Sunday event of the Tuymans' exhibit.)

Erik, Michael and I followed up our little get together with Chai - which always makes me particularly chatty and giddy. I was so glad to see people coming back to town and it reminds me that school starts back up Monday and I think it's going to be another intense 18 credit quarter. Here's my schedule so far:

Monday/Wednesday

8:15-10:15 - Gym

10:30-12:00 - Modern Technique with Susan Hadley

12:15-5:15 - Work at the Wexner Center

5:30-7:30 - Interactive Media

Tuesday/Thursday

8:45-10:15 - Modern Technique with Bebe Miller

10:30-2:30 - Work at the Wexner Center

2:45-4:15 - Choreography

7:00-9:00 - Rehearsal (with fellow grad students)

Friday

7:30-8:30 - Gym

9:00-12:00 - Postmodernism

12:30-2:30 - Work at the Wexner Center

2:45-4:15 - Choreography

I will also be cramming other rehearsals in there as I will be doing an Independent Study where I learn 3 solos originally choreographed for male dancers by 3 different male choreographers. We're all really excited about this project. I have no idea what I will do with it or if it will merely be for the process. Either way, I will learn something and gain some new insight on picking up material.

I am also working with Abby, another fellow grad, on a boxing piece. Again, I'm not sure where that will go, but I'm happy about the possibilities. (Yes, she's sitting in a sink - she cracks me up.)

Somewhere in all this activity, I hope to read something out the of the seven books I just ordered! Lots to look forward to!